Community Service Annoucement

Dirty Pretty Things has a gig!


Come support them support Motor Vehicle Sundown and Fur Patrol @ the Old Bar on the 9th of December.

They are the original. Preceded the film they clearly inspired.

They are very dirtypretty.

They are very gifted, musical things.

I might be there, so stalkers this is your head start.

This is for Simon O

Not too long ago AC/DC Lane was mentioned in conversation at Rue Bebelons. I forget why, All I remember is that I interupted with something about bloggers and Knifey and then someone might have interupted me with something sarcastic like "Boggers? Ha!". Or maybe they didn't and maybe everyone just sat there silently while I banged on with "Did you know, that according to Knifey, stencils are out and post-ups are the next big thing to hit the backstreets?!" And then maybe a tumble weed rolled past.

Well Simon O, I thought you might be interested, so here's Knifey!

My life is a mess, my hair is a mess, ohwell.

Greg was 22 on the 22nd, how excitment! And to celebrate we went out last night and did stuff, all on whims - which i think is the best and only way to do things in this current emotional climate. Much of the best cannot be blogged or captured on camera because it is of the stuff that dwindles the moment you touch it...or maybe I just dreamt it.

At some point Greg may have expressed a desire to go the the St Andrews Pub for a parma.*

We went to the Short Crap Film Festival @ Loop. Some films were actually crap, but they were all short.

We went to Ding Dong (mostly because I had never been before and something had to be done about that), it was quiet, maybe because the band sounded like Creed or maybe cos it was Wednesday. A shot of Jaeger brought tears to my eyes. I walked into the boys toilets by accident (seems to be happening to me a lot lately), nothing lewd happening like at Revolter so this time I just turned around and went to the girls.

Greg and Kylie began to make the long trek home at a sensible hour - work in the morning & post exam stress.

Kim and I decided we needed more. We went to Polly for a change. People there claimed that I went to school with them, they seemed to know a lot about the school and kim and i so i took their word for it. One of them was doing magic tricks. By this stage drinks seemed to be coming fast and out of nowhere (oh, except, of course, for the drinks that you, leigh, poured for me, i always notice those) so i asked if they could make themselves disapear, and you know what? They did.

I met the gorgeous Kate. And when i did she said "Finally", which I thought was such a nice thing to say that I think it deserve a mention.

I flipped my first bird ever, but only cos Brad asked so politely. It was a night of firsts.

Then it got ugly. I found myself behind the bar in a scottish accent. It was at this point Leigh decided it was time to take me home.

Zoooooooom, I think we flew home. Ani was very loud, we were very loud. We flew home smiling and singing, kicking and squealing. I pronounced that "Fuck You" was my favourite Ani song, i don't know why. Somehow one last bottle of beer made it with us into the car.

Then I crash landed home and these were the last words i wrote:

" I smash home as if I weren't.
The door slides,
I don't feel that I would choose a door
that slides.
My ears are full,
brimming and ringing,
Mind packed with cotton wool.
I am not here
by choice
I see
and I see my handwriting.
Would I really choose this style?
How much of this is mine?
...I think i will be sick"

GENIUS

See I always knew there was a poet in me somewhere, i was just never drunk enough...no, I was.

Ha XX

*Sorry greg, maybe when it's not your birthday.

And now for something completely stupid

AFTER THE FORMAL AFTER-PARTY
BY CARA


Police
mer mer mer mer
no Scott
lollipop lollipop lollipop lollipop
I'm going to take all my music to Alice's party
ok
we can finally have something worth listening to
yeAH
I love snoopy
easy steps
I quit
I QUIT
I think i've played it before
ruby
jenni can control the heating in her room
it heats up EVERYTHING
cleopatra
elizabeth taylor
jennifer amanda walsh
lauren maree sharp
cara elise schultz
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
merity mer mer mer
I'm going to the zoo for my birthday
hey hey hey
why?
ok
I am so tired
i've never been so drunk in my life
NOT
I want a lesbian candle
in purple
quoi?
meep
meep
meep
let's not rehash it
gumnut baby
get in my belly
mo, momomomomom
wally bob
@start.com.au
narnee noo
I want solitaire
cos it was a pub and we were in grade 6
we had lunch outside
fat and scary men
that's the country for you
beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer
the drunken mistakes of our past
at least you got some
lurrrvin
police
that's what I think
I do not think therefore I am a moustache
I had a good time in the limo
she has issues
no one will have done it
brr
no don't walk
far too much effort
freaky chesty thing.

The Jenni Penny

Or

The Jepenny

Or

A Very Shaggy Dog

© 2001: First appeared on a scrap of paper, in a high school of the northeastern suburbs, one lunchtime.




Once, a girl named Jenni decided to create a new form of currency. She told her friend with much excitement, “Cara, I’ve just made a jepenny!”

This sparked the beginning of a revolutionary revolution that became known as the Revolutionary Jennifernization Revolution. This was a process similar to the Balkanization in Yugoslavia and parts of Indonesia (apparently). When Jenni heard this amazing fact, she said, “Wow!”

The jepenny consisted of only one small coin, thus making it one of the most highly sought after collectors’ items in the history of the world. Only having one coin in a currency is crucial to understanding the fundamental existentialism of Jenni’s ideology*. Within this ideology, Maths, numbers, time and anything sensical or linear is considered “Bad!”, however, this “badness” can only ever be understood as subjective, as Jenni’s friend, Cara pointed out.

Surely the very meaning of your ideology is centred around personal choice and hence this dismissal of maths and science as “bad” is perfectly in line with this. “Sorry” Cara said, “I Just argued my own point and yours simultaneously, freakshow!”



*Jennism, similar to McCarthyism in Cold War America

Just one last snap before you go.

Cara Xara, for all your tales of travel and adventure, let me put it into the words of Collette's Japanese exchange student: "I envy you!"