Sunday Vague

I was supposed to go to an art opening thing at Utopian Slumps last night. An art opening for something by a friend of a friend about something I never really took the time to try and understand. But then I realised at the last minute that I would be at work for most of its duration anyway and so on...

Then i was supposed to go to a farewell party for my best friend's boyfriend, Josh. He's heading off to meet her in LA so they can drive off into the sunset on a big American highway to live happily ever after in Panama.

But I didn't do that either.

After that I would probably have found myself at Kim's house, maybe thrown-up in his front garden before letting myself in and getting stoned with Nathan in front of a Hendrix documentary until I passed out. Then maybe Kim would have come home from the party he went to to hang out with his exgirlfriend and he might have carried me to bed.

Could have woken up to the sound of Casey's Psytrance production this morning

But I didn't.

I went straight home from ACMI last night. Thought about staying up to watch a few episodes of Dexter with my parents but ended up in bed by 9.30. It was bliss.

Got a few sighs of disappointment from Kim sent to me via sms about my lack of attendance in his bed at 5am (which i secretly got some pleasure from) but I think it worked out better for me this way.

No hangover today, got some washing done and important bits of paper sorted.
Feel like I've got better a better hold on the reins now.

Might even do a little vacuuming later

Have a few good parties coming up soon, might be good blog material on it's way.



PS. The obsessive fan girl from the Flight of the Concords show came into acmi yesterday. I told here I loved her, she seemed to like hearing it.

I got some sleep

Things are a little better today.
Don't have to put up so much of a fight to keep from crying in the screen gallery at acmi where Robert and I discuss our current relationship dramas.

I'm trying not to fall in love all over the place for once.

Trying to channel some passion into other areas of my life for once.
Like dancing, I'm gonna take up go-go dancing, get some girls togeher and maybe dance for some friends bands in ridiculous outfits if they'll have us.

Might go back to study something a little more creative soon. I'm pretty sure there's a creative bone still in there somewhere.

Anyway, every now and again I fall in love with a love song. Here is what is currently on repeat in my head at the moment.

Still tired

Love life and life in general is still full of uncertainties.
Maybe if I just get some sleep things will...

Met Caitlin for lunch today.
Haven't seen her in such a long time and when I found myself perusing the shoes in Myers I realised things were getting dark. But Caitlin is a great listener and I needed someone to listen, even if it was for just 30 minutes.
We bonded over tales of lost loves and how we lost.

Just ate takeaway noodles with Brother Simon at home.
He told me how he just broke up with Chloe last night.
The strange thing was, somehow I already knew.



A cool change is on its way. Even though I admit it's possible that I have been waiting, or maybe I was just expecting for long time, I can't help but feel an awfull regret on it's imminent arrival.

I went to Thailand and now I'm back.

I'll talk about it some other time.

I work at ACMI now. I sort of love it. Even though I don't do very much and get paid well for it. and I'm so incredibly tired from working about 50hrs this week with ridiculous 7am starts that I can't really be bother to think or punctuate to do your reading eyes justice.

Today a man confronted me in ACMI about an alleged conversation I had with him last week at ACMI where I apparently "called" him gay. I almost laughed it seemed so absurd and enquired as to how he thought this might have come up in the conversation with me in the ACMI foyer. He pointed to the Sesame Street-like letters that spell out 'Queer' by the escalators advertising the Queer Film festival and he said I must have thought he was gay because of the festival and because he was visiting the Game On exhibition with a male friend. All I could think to say was "but that just doesn't sound like something I'd say" while I wished a small child would fall down the stairs and start bleeding profuslely just so I didn't have to continue perhaps the most awkward conversation I think I've ever been undeservably trapped. How do you tell someone how uninterested you are about how gay or not gay they are without sounding like a member of parliment trying to closet their inherent conservatism. And then I twigged that 'game' sort of sounds like 'gay' if you aren't really listening and suggested that I may have said something about him and his friend perhaps being "a couple of GAME enthusiasts" since they'd asked me if they could have unlimited re-entry. And so I think I won and he walked away probably feeling like the idiot that I think really is. ha ha.

And then Luke T came and found me and mentioned he's going travelling and he might go visit Simon in Shanghai. And I remembered that I miss Simon. And realised that I now miss Cara too. And then I spent two hours staring at my reflection in the glass opposite me while I was working in the cloakroom. I started feeling a bit sad ... and I still do. Maybe it's just cos I've been working so much and I'm tired and haven't had time to see anyone or do anything fun since I got back.

And my love life is so... i don't know...